She Needs R.E.S.T.: A New Playbook for Women’s Well-Being in the Age of Overwhelm

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Women of my generation, Xennials, a micro-generation typically defined by birth years from approximately 1977 to 1983, were lied to at a very young age when we were promised that we could “have it all.” However, the data and many of our lived experiences tell a more complicated story. In 2025, signs of strain are flashing red: Women’s labor-force gains have slowed or reversed in key pockets, Black women’s unemployment has jumped, and the rollback of flexible work is squeezing caregivers hardest (Carrazana, 2025; Popera, 2025).

As of August 2025, Black women’s unemployment stood at 7.5%, far above the overall jobless rate of 4.3%, a widening gap that coincides with federal workforce cuts and the contraction of remote work policies that had previously supported caregivers (Bureau of Labor Statistics [BLS], 2025a; Peck, 2025; Semuels, 2025). At the same time, the cultural expectation to be endlessly capable remains intact.

These are not just economic indicators; they are also stress indicators. Decades of research show that chronic, unrelenting stress elevates allostatic load, the wear and tear of stress on the body, contributing to cardiometabolic disease and mental health risks (Volarić et al., 2024). Black women carry especially high physiological stress burdens relative to White peers, reflecting the compounding effects of racism, sexism, and role overload (Wallace et al., 2013; Bailey et al., 2025).

The Cracks Beneath “Having It All”

To understand why women’s well-being requires more than better self-care, we need to look at the economy inside the home as well as the one outside of it. Wharton economist Corinne Low (2025) argues that many women are making “deals” under unequal constraints where the domestic division of labor, social norms, and inflexible job structures conspire to make the pursuit of “having it all” a losing bargain. Low’s work also emphasizes that gender norms, not comparative advantage, continue to anchor housework and caregiving disproportionately to women. This leads to undercutting wage equality and, more importantly, is a key driver of burnout (Low, 2025; Murray, 2025).

In an attempt to counter these statistics and the overwhelming lived experiences of women, particularly Black women, the R.E.S.T. framework (Recovery, Emotional Agility, Support, and Time) offers a culturally grounded, evidence-informed path from endurance to well-being. It recognizes that flourishing is not a solo sport and that personal tools must be matched with structural reality.

From Survival to Flourishing: The R.E.S.T. Framework

R.E.S.T. reframes well-being as restoration, not a practice for optimization. It is built around four synergistic pillars:

Recovery

Recovery treats the action of rest, as defined by Asp (2015), as a state of harmony among one’s feelings, motivation, and actions. It is nonnegotiable infrastructure for health, not a trophy at the end of productivity. Rest is not merely inactivity; it may involve quiet reflection, creative engagement, or pleasurable sensations aligned with one’s personal motivations (Asp, 2015).

One easy way to incorporate more recovery time into daily life is through micro-pauses. Micro-breaks are short, intentional pauses from work tasks lasting no longer than ten minutes. They are designed to restore energy, reduce fatigue, and enhance overall well-being (Albulescu et al., 2022). Micro-pauses represent an essential recovery mechanism in fast-paced, high-demand environments. They can be thought of as mini recovery moments because they are brief activities that allow the mind and body to relax and reset. These small but powerful pauses allow the body and mind to replenish depleted psychological and physical resources before continuing demanding activities (Albulescu et al., 2022). Micro-breaks can include stretching, deep breathing, taking a short walk, enjoying a brief chat, simply stepping away from a screen, or any short activity that allows the mind and body to relax and reset. 

Recovery should be viewed as an intentional act of emotional restoration. It extends beyond mini recovery breaks or micro-pauses to include practices like therapy, journaling, or creating space to feel without judgment. Recovery, as defined in the R.E.S.T. framework, actively disrupts the pattern that rest is simply inactivity. It affirms the necessity of rest, not as a reward for productivity but as a precondition for wellness.

Emotional Agility

Research on emotion regulation and psychological flexibility shows that naming and skillfully engaging with emotions rather than suppressing them supports resilience and mental health (Gross, 1998; Kashdan & Rottenberg, 2010; Cherry et al., 2021). For women navigating racism and gendered stressors, emerging studies highlight how clarity about emotions can buffer trauma-related symptoms and pain (Green et al., 2024; Wilson & Gentzler, 2021). Emotional agility offers a transformative practice for managing conflicting emotions and feelings.

Emotional agility refers to the capacity to be present with one’s thoughts and emotions in a mindful, values-aligned, and nonjudgmental manner (David, 2016). Unlike emotional suppression (intentionally withholding or not expressing emotions), emotional agility enables the individual to accept emotional experiences as data rather than directives (Gross, 1998; Gross & John, 2003; David, 2016).

Emotional agility enables individuals to acknowledge and regulate emotions with flexibility, serving as a mediator between resilience and overall well-being (Yasmeen et al., 2024). It fosters adaptability and self-regulation by allowing individuals to reshape negative thoughts and emotions into constructive interpretations (Ștefan & Ilie, 2023). This flexibility leads to reduced emotional tension, higher self-esteem, and improved stress management (Ștefan & Ilie, 2023; Yasmeen et al., 2024). Through this practice, individuals can avoid the psychological harm caused by emotional suppression (David, 2016).

For Black women, this skill is especially vital given the sociohistorical contexts that shape their emotional experiences (Woods-Giscombe, 2010). Emotional agility can empower women to acknowledge and honor complex emotions such as rage, grief, and exhaustion, while also experiencing positive emotions like joy, gratitude, inspiration, and pride, without becoming defined or overwhelmed by them (David, 2016). Yasmeen et al. (2024) suggest that emotional agility can be developed through mindfulness, which helps individuals observe emotions without judgment and respond thoughtfully rather than reactively. Regular mindfulness and reflection practices, such as meditation, journaling, or breathwork, build the self-awareness needed to process emotions effectively. Emotional agility can also be strengthened by engaging in activities that promote the positive reinterpretation of situations—for example, reframing failures as learning opportunities or acknowledging that emotional discomfort is part of growth.

Support

Support is defined as the perceived or actual availability of assistance and care from others—whether emotional, informational, or instrumental—that helps individuals cope with stress and maintain well-being (Semmer et al., 2008). Support comes in many forms, each offering a unique pathway to connection and well-being. Emotional support involves listening with empathy, validating someone’s feelings, and offering comfort during moments of distress (Reblin & Uchino, 2008). Instrumental support provides tangible assistance, such as giving a ride, offering financial help, or watching a friend’s children to lighten life’s practical burdens (Semmer et al., 2008). Informational support helps people navigate challenges by sharing advice, expertise, or resources that lead to better decision-making and problem-solving (Reblin & Uchino, 2008). Finally, affiliative support strengthens our sense of belonging through meaningful friendships, participation in support groups, and engagement in community networks (Bedrov & Gable, 2022).

Women’s needs for affiliative support are uniquely shaped by their biobehavioral and social tendencies. According to Bedrov and Gable (2022), women are more likely than men to employ tend-and-befriend strategies, meaning they nurture relationships (tend) and seek social connection and support (befriend) during stress rather than adopting a fight-or-flight response. Within the R.E.S.T. framework, support underscores the vital role of culturally affirming relationships and community-based care. These networks, ranging from intimate friendships and sister circles to therapy, mentorship, and formalized programs, offer not only comfort but also resistance against the structural and emotional weight that Black women disproportionately carry. Women benefit when support networks promote reciprocity, emotional validation, and shared caregiving, which align with both ancestral and modern cooperative survival strategies (Bedrov & Gable, 2022).

Time

Finally, time confronts the paradox at the center of modern womanhood: We are richer in gadgets and poorer in hours. Time poverty refers to the chronic feeling of having too many things to do and not enough time to do them, often caused by conflicting demands on a person’s limited hours (Northeastern GAP Working Paper, 2024). Rodgers (2023) defines time poverty as a form of deprivation that occurs when individuals must work long hours—both paid and unpaid—without sufficient time for rest, leisure, or self-care. It captures the imbalance between necessary time (for paid work, caregiving, and household tasks) and discretionary time (for recovery and well-being).

Unlike income poverty, which focuses solely on financial resources, time poverty recognizes that time is also a scarce and essential resource that directly affects well-being, productivity, and agency. Women, in particular, experience higher rates of time poverty due to their disproportionate share of unpaid domestic and caregiving work (Rodgers, 2023; Northeastern GAP Working Paper, 2024).

For women, especially mothers and single parents, time poverty is structurally produced by rigid work policies and unequal domestic loads. Lauriane Ngaya Fonkou (2021) contends that time poverty among Black women is not a reflection of poor individual planning but a systemic condition rooted in the interlocking forces of racism, sexism, and classism. These forces collectively devalue Black women’s time, producing a scarcity of discretionary hours available for rest, leisure, and self-care (Boucher, 2022). Reclaiming time means boundary-setting, but it also requires institutional redesign: flexible work, predictable scheduling, and childcare supports.

Solving the problem of time poverty requires a mix of personal action, workplace reform, and supportive public policy, especially for women who carry a disproportionate share of unpaid labor. Rodgers (2023) highlights the need to invest in social and physical infrastructure, such as affordable childcare. At the organizational level, Giurge, Whillans, and West (2020) call for greater workplace flexibility and time affluence, encouraging companies to build schedules that respect personal time through flexible hours, shorter meetings, and clear boundaries around after-hours communication. Such changes not only improve productivity but also boost happiness and job satisfaction.

There is also a need to value and redistribute unpaid labor. Caregiving and domestic work are often invisible in economic statistics and should be recognized in policy and shared more equitably between genders (Giurge et al., 2020; Rodgers, 2023). Encouraging men to take parental leave and shifting social norms about household roles can help lighten the load for women. Finally, women themselves can counter time poverty through agency and support systems. Setting clear boundaries, delegating tasks, and leaning on their various support systems are powerful steps toward balance.

Why This Moment Demands R.E.S.T.

R.E.S.T. does not replace ambition; it protects it. Recovery sustains energy. Emotional agility keeps us honest and whole. Support multiplies resilience. And time returns agency. R.E.S.T. is not a self-care routine but a strategy for flourishing.

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About the author | Jasmine Brett Stringer (C’25) is a dynamic keynote speaker, award-winning author, and television personality who helps individuals and organizations flourish through the science of positive psychology. As Founder & CEO of Carpe Diem with Jasmine LLC, she blends research and real-world insight to inspire authentic leadership, resilience, and well-being. Her signature frameworks, ACIR, R.E.S.T., and Seize Your Life equip audiences to overcome overwhelm and thrive. Jasmine has partnered with organizations such as the Federal Reserve Bank, Land O’ Lakes, and Airbnb. A graduate of American University and the University of Pennsylvania’s Master of Applied Psychology program, she calls Minneapolis home.